If you talk to divorced friends or do research online, you will get a lot of advice on various subjects about marital separation. From who will get custody to who will get what assets, everyone is full of opinions. Unfortunately, a lot of these well-meaning people believe certain myths about divorce. Plus, even if one strategy worked for a friend of yours, it does not necessarily mean it will work for you.
If you believe in some divorce myths or assume yours will pan out exactly like another divorce, you can end up hurting your chances of getting the best outcome. Below are some harmful myths about divorce and what you should believe instead.
1. Mothers always get custody.
This is not always the case. Both parents have the opportunity to be custodial parents. The court will determine the details of custody and visitation based on the best interests of your children. Do not assume gender is the all-deciding factor in this process. More important factors include each parent's health, capability, stability and location, among others in the Michigan Child Custody Act.
2. Divorce is always toxic.
It is true that divorcing can lead to hostile court battles and playing the blame game, but it does not have to be that way for you. You may even believe that using threats or terror tactics will help you get what you want. However, even if you divorce through court, you can strive for negotiation instead of acrimony. This can be helpful, especially if you end up with joint custody or a co-parenting agreement in the end.
3. Equitable distribution means a 50/50 division of assets.
Michigan divorces must follow equitable distribution laws, but do not assume the division will be exactly equal. The split of your marital property may be unequal depending on income and a variety of other factors. Do not believe the myth that the split will be directly down the middle.